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Loretta - 153
Push - 92
***
The 2013 edition of "Lockhorns vs. Lockhorn" concludes much as it has done all year with a victory by Loretta. Congratulations once again to Loretta Lockhorn for taking the title. In four full years of "Lockhorn vs. Lockhorn" she has managed to win in convincing fashion every year. Loretta responded to Leroy coming off his best effort last year by putting up her most dominant season yet, scoring over 150 points and topping Leroy by a record 44 points overall; utilizing her vicious wit, impeccable timing, and unwavering meanness. Dynasty thy name is Loretta.
Now this would usually be the point where I would encourage Leroy to look forward to next year, to learn from his losses so he can improve his strengths and sure up his weaknesses. However, it is is with a slightly heavy heart that I announce that this will be the final "Lockhorn vs. Lockhorn", at least for the time being. After five years, almost 1,600 comics, and a lifetime of insults I feel I have taken the blog as far as it could go. Now this isn't to say that this is the complete end, this site has been on hiatus before and if I feel that if there can be a new way to draw more vile, spiteful, blood from this hateful stone I will definitely return. For 2014 though at least I going to take a break from the bitterness. As a near daily ritual for half a decade it has been a tumultuous and hostile, but ultimately enjoyable ride (though there were some Sundays where those Showdowns took a bit more motivation to get through) and I hope all you readers out there (all five of you) had fun too.
*Author's Note: I have call it a push since Loretta's mother is doing all the damage here. Plus, "incomepoop"? Really?
*Author's Note #2: After some retroactive number crunching, it turns out that with that push, Loretta has managed to mathematically clinch victory for 2013! Congratulations to Loretta for the three-peat and fourth win overall. The conclusion seemed forgone for a while but this is by far the earliest Loretta have ever locked up a year. For Leroy this is an unfortunate regression after his improved showing in 2012 when remained alive all the way to mid-December. We'll see if he can still muster some competitive spirit and finish strong in December.
Making Cheddar
Author's Note: A not so subtle plug by the Lockhorns for the Golden Dolphin Restaurant in Huntington. Also congratulations to Loretta for being the first to reach the 100 mark this year!
Official Count:
Leroy - 35
Loretta - 47
Push - 19
Official Count:
Leroy - 23
Loretta - 32
Push - 11
Official Count:
Leroy - 19
Loretta - 26
Push - 11
Official Count:
Leroy - 9
Loretta - 13
Push - 5
