December 20, 2009: Sunday Showdown!

(Click to enlarge)

Clockwise from the bottom left:

• Leroy's tale of how he was chased out of his home and into the gym by Loretta's unbearably awful singing and instrument playing would have been a bona fide point but without Loretta around to be insulted it can't be officially counted. Actually Loretta's absence may be an unexpected benefit for Leroy. The sight of a miserable, sweaty, Leroy struggling on a treadmill with apparently no shoes on would be a prime opportunity for her to unleash a bitting quip of her own. Also, what sort of bizarre gym places a treadmill directly in front of the weight machine so both users can't avoid awkwardly staring at each other? It's a push.
• I guess Loretta's suggestion of personal infidelity is supposed to offend Leroy? While Loretta may be a bubbling cauldron of rage and jealousy every time she sees Leroy drunkenly flirting with bimbos or ogling girls at the beach or coming home suspiciously late, somehow I don't think Leroy would be all that heartbroken if Loretta left him for another man. I think this fisherman would be all too happy to be throwing this catch back out onto the sea. Regardless of Leroy's final reaction, it's still a good insult on paper; Loretta goes up 1-0.
• I don't get it. Obviously Loretta's persistant reminding of Leroy is textbook nagging, so I'm not sure what Loretta is trying to do by characterizing her nagging in a different manner. She's not even using any sort of euphemism, she's just detailing her nagging. Is this supposed to be some sort of slight on Leroy? All I know is, Leroy's unhappy and Loretta is continuing to nag him so the winner here by default is Loretta. She takes a 2-0 lead.
• Leroy finally gets a point on the board with a grand toast at the dinner table to the eventual death of his tastebuds. Almost every time Leroy found himself in an extended funk this year, it was usually Loretta's vile homecooking that got him an easy rebound. Regretably, there was only so many meals for Leroy to exploit this year. For Loretta, the tastebuds aren't the only parts of Leroy that she wishes would stop functioning. Leroy cuts the lead down to 2-1.
• The story may be that Leroy was so absentminded that he managed to accidentally arrive at the opera in his full face painted fan regalia, but I suspect this was all a deceptive ruse diabolically carried out by Loretta to trick him into coming to the opera house looking foolish. I'm not really sure what team or even sport Leroy is so fanatically rooting for here. It almost looks like a weird amalgam of the NY Giants and the Jets colors, but he also looks dressed more for baseball. Confusion aside, Loretta scores a decisive point and takes the day 3-1.
  

Official Count:

Leroy - 109

Loretta - 142
Push - 103