March 6, 2011: Sunday Showdown!

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Clockwise from the bottom left:

• Bowling night hasn't even begun and Leroy is already all over Loretta about her deranged sense of vanity. Loretta should be content with the fact that the bowling alley even had bowling shoes that fit her massive feet, let alone ones that matched her outfit. What I don't understand is why a couple that obviously takes bowling seriously enough to have personal shirts and balls don't have their own pair of bowling shoes. That poor alley employee sure looks tired holding up those enormous shoes. Leroy takes the early lead 1-0.
• It seems the Lockhorns are really set on attending more Sunday church services this year. Perhaps it's all part of some New Year's resolution? Whatever the case may be, even the reverend cannot resist making a crack about the Lockhorns' unholy union. Of course, to be accurate, the Lockhorns' may be enemies but there is nothing remotely close to love in their relationship. A weak attempt by the reverend, but I'm sure he'll have plenty of opportunities throughout the year to work on his material. It's a push, Leroy still leads 1-0.
• Loretta engages in some good old fashioned early morning torture in denying Leroy his precious morning cup of joe. If I were Leroy I would not be in such a rush to get my daily caffeine fix, Loretta's insistence that she won't show him the latest credit card statement until he had his morning "coffee" screams poisoning attempt. On the plus side for Leroy, if he is poisoned to death at least he won't be responsible for whatever massive figure that'll be on that statement. Loretta ties the score 1-1.
• It looks like another edition of "schlubby middle-aged man poker night" is in the books. By Loretta's "sense of humor" I'm assuming Leroy meant "inhibitions regarding physical violence", so it's probably a prudent move for him to head on home. The absence of Loretta already precluded any chance of a point here for Leroy but regardless, his statement can hardly even be considered an insult. Wouldn't most wives be unhappy with the prospect of their husbands out gambling past midnight? Push, still tied at 1-1.
• It's not exactly a masterpiece of wit and sophistication but Loretta's dig at Leroy's fashion violation is enough to get the job done. As a consummate pro and former champion, Loretta knows that sometimes you just have to do the unglamorous, nitty gritty, little things to get the points. Sure, "fashion SWAT team" won't make it into the headlines or top year end lists, but it gets her the point and the win, which are all that really matter in the end. Loretta guts out another close Sunday Showdown 2-1.

Official Count:

Leroy - 24
Loretta - 23
Push - 18