A Note from the Editor

A new year is coming upon us and many lingering "Lockhorn vs. Lockhorn" lovers may be happy to know that I did not forget my promise, when I went on hiatus in November, to return in 2011 with a new "Lockhorn vs. Lockhorn" format. It has been a magical, wonderfully contentious, deeply bitter year and half long ride, but I feel I've gone as far as I could go with the old post and analysis format and thought perhaps a slight change was in order.

What exactly will be this new look for 2011? It's really not that huge of an overhaul. I'll still keep a running year long tally of who is getting the upper hand in the Lockhorns' eternal domestic struggle (I'm thinking Leroy may be due this year), but I wanted to change up my approach to the panels. So rather than posting them and writing my usual rambling analysis and conjecture, I wanted to really go to the heart of the comic and deconstruct every insult, bad pun, sarcastic commentary, petty jab, etc. down its simplest form. It sounds a little complicated but it's really just me writing over the captions to explain the joke; I'm doing it partially because it's easier than writing out all those long paragraphs.

Fans of the old format however, should take heart, I am keeping the old "Sunday Sundowns" (unless of course I fall behind and get overwhelmed by them and give up halfway through the year) so you can get your fix of vintage "Lockhorn vs. Lockhorn".

So that's basically my plan for the upcoming year, we'll have to see if I can actually execute it for the next 12 months or if I just end up scrapping the whole project all together (man, daily exposure to the Lockhorns really saps one's optimism). Best of luck to Leroy and Loretta and here's to a new year and a new round of bouts.

May 15, 2010

I always found Leroy's criticisms about the amount of clutter in Loretta's purse to be one of his weakest attacking points. Loretta is such a wonderfully prolific collection of monstrously ugly personal flaws and gross offensive female caricatures; there is almost always something better to riff on. Leroy's explanation here seems almost reasonable. There really should never be anything close to "reasonable" when dealing with Lockhorn insults. However in the end when it comes to winning those all important points, insulters can't be choosers, and the chronically behind Leroy can use every point he can get.

Official Count:

Leroy - 42
Loretta - 51
Push - 41

May 14, 2010

In the case of Leroy it's quite interesting that someone who lacks the technological aptitude to operate a VCR can somehow manage to reprogram a home vacuuming robot to fetch him beers from the kitchen. Apparently he is a true savant when it comes to activities that facilitate his drinking habits. While situations where Loretta portrays Leroy as a raging alcoholic in front of others usually end with her being awarded a point, I'm inclined to rule for Leroy in this situation. He has managed to ingeniously managed to subvert Loretta by proudly owning and displaying his drinking problem and causing her to be embarrassed in the eyes of her wavy haired friend. Leroy grabs a point.

Official Count:

Leroy - 41
Loretta - 51
Push - 41

May 13, 2010

I understand the established trope that Leroy is cheap and that it leads to humorous scenes of exaggerated frugality on his part, but isn't he being pretty rational in negotiating with the travel agent? "What's on sale" may be an idiosyncratic way of putting it, but don't most people who are planning a vacation with a travel agency want to know if there are any travel deals or discounts available? Is it me or is there not really a joke going on here? I just don't get it. In any case, it looks like there are going to be some intrusive airport security related hijinks on the horizon. Let's all this one a push.

Official Count:

Leroy - 40
Loretta - 51
Push - 41

May 12, 2010

With Loretta worn down, despondent, and depressed after a miserable day, Leroy blows an absolutely perfect opportunity to drive a well placed dagger (metaphorically and possibly physically) right into Loretta's back. Unfortunately for Leroy, Loretta actually manages to beat him to the punch with a self-deprecating fat joke, diffusing any chance for Leroy to capitalize. Is this a daringly clever stratagem by Loretta or just an unintended lucky break? Either way it is an amazing turn of events as Loretta's comment manages to reverse a potential point for Leroy into a harmless push.

Official Count:

Leroy - 40
Loretta - 51
Push - 40

May 11, 2010

For this evening's fare Loretta whips up an especially unappetizing crab cake entrée that no amount of Old Bay Seasoning can fix. Tonight's "meal" is a new low even for Loretta. Her culinary creations in the past may have been as equally disgusting and inedible but at least they looked like some effort was put into their preparation. Loretta at least had to do some activity akin to cooking to turn edible raw ingredients into repulsive piles of foul gray colored mush. Here, she won't even be bothered to take the crab meat out of the shell before ruining it. Regardless, it's still going to be another hungry night for Leroy; at least he gets the point.

Official Count:

Leroy - 40
Loretta - 51
Push - 39

May 10, 2010

Leroy's constant channel flipping seems to be a pettier than usual matter for Loretta to set her sights on. On top of that, her "roaming charges" joke is pretty weak. I think Leroy is more disappointed with the groan worthy quality of the line than Loretta's actual criticism of his short television attention span. He may be personally offended by the joke but he is probably more offended by the sub par effort in its execution. Well we are still recovering from a recession, I guess we all have to lower our expectations a little bit during these lean times. Loretta gets the point.

Official Count:

Leroy - 39
Loretta - 51
Push - 39