Official Count:
Leroy - 73
Loretta - 93
Push - 46
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Monday, July 29, 2013
July 29, 2013
*Author's Note: I think the fact that Satan himself is the pitchman may have tipped off Leroy.
Official Count:
Leroy - 72
Loretta - 92
Push - 46
Sunday, July 28, 2013
July 28, 2013: Sunday Showdown!
(Click to Enlarge)
Clockwise from the bottom left:
- I have to say Leroy has never looked more modern than in his "dinner" outfit. It looks like he's going for unkempt redneck but he would not look out of place enjoying a set at Coachella or walking to brunch in Williamburg. Leroy's restaurant selection could work either way in embarrassing Loretta. He may have booked a table at a fancy restaurant, in which case he would be the one humiliating Loretta or he may have selected an overly causal place in which Loretta would be overdressed. Well played hipster Leroy. Leroy gets the point and leads 1-0.
- My initial instinct was to award the point to Loretta for making Leroy beg and apologize, but after thinking about it, I think Leroy deserves the credit for going with an insincere apology. He clearly has no regrets about his actions; in fact he doesn't even seem to be aware what his actions were. None of this could really be interpreted as a victory for Loretta. It's not the strongest of wins but Leroy ends up with a better case for the point. Leroy pulls ahead 2-0.
- The Lockhorns' financial situation is wildly inconsistent. They often despair over their crippling debt while struggling to keep above the poverty line. Then there are plenty of scenes of them taking vacations, going out to the theater, and of course there are those mad Loretta shopping sprees. Scenes like this where Leroy complains about the upkeep costs of his sailboat make me question the Lockhorns' finances. It could be that the Lockhorns are poor because of these extravagant personal expenditures. It's a push. Leroy still leads 2-0.
- This may well be the most satisfying victory that Leroy has gotten over Loretta this year thus far. I really enjoy the creativity of Leroy in exploiting Loretta's self consciousness so he can get out of doing yard work and hit the links. It probably wasn't easy manipulating the lawnmower in such a way as to have it legibly spell out Leroy's message. Leroy's victory in the panel is all the more sweeter since his point officially clinches the day for him. Leroy leads 3-0.
- Loretta manages to avoid the shutout, on a day that really belonged to Leroy. It seems somewhat out of character for Leroy to have any interest in the Kardashian clan (I suppose they have some of the bimbo-like elements that he enjoys). I would think Loretta would be more into the celebrity/reality TV culture. There's always the chance Loretta is just making everything up just to manufacture an insult. It'd be dishonest and completely acceptable. Loretta scores a point. Leroy wins the Sunday Showdown 3-1.
Official Count:
Leroy - 72
Loretta - 92
Push - 45
Sunday Showdown Count:
Leroy - 8
Loretta - 13
Push - 9
Saturday, July 27, 2013
Friday, July 26, 2013
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
July 23, 2013
*Author's Note: Where the hell did Loretta get that needle? Look at the size of that thing!
Official Count:
Leroy - 68
Loretta - 92
Push - 44
Monday, July 22, 2013
July 22, 2013
*Author's Note: Just yesterday, Loretta was worried about Leroy driving too fast. She's just being a dick here; which is totally encouraged in "Lockhorn vs. Lockhorn".
Official Count:
Leroy - 68
Loretta - 91
Push - 44
Sunday, July 21, 2013
July 21, 2013: Sunday Showdown!
(Click to Enlarge)
Clockwise from the bottom left:
- If the Lockhorns were going to go through all the hassle of sneaking out of the restaurant, they might as well have just avoided paying for the meal all together. How much is riding on that dinning coupon anyway? It is somewhat jarring to see the Lockhorns working together, it just doesn't seem right at all. I strained a bit to make out the restaurant's name on the window. It turned out to be Grasso's in nearby Cold Spring Harbor. From the looks of the place and the general reviews online, it seems like a pleasant enough dinning establishment; hopefully the Lockhorns mention won't hurt business too much. It's a push as we continue through the Sunday 0-0.
- That's right, Loretta is asking for the keys because she doesn't feel safe with Leroy driving. Unless Leroy is feeling especially reckless or downright suicidal, there is no way he would voluntarily relinquish control of the car to her. When Loretta cites Leroy's NASCAR viewing as the reason he shouldn't drive, I think it might be more because of all the drinking he did while watching rather than the negative influence watching fast driving. Leroy looks like he's got a good buzz going already. Despite the ridiculousness, Loretta gets the point and leads 1-0.
- It's always an extra bitter scene when one of the Lockhorns uses the sarcastic affection route to get in their insult. Here, rather than just angrily accusing Loretta of blaming him for everything, Leroy goes the more subtle route. This sort of angle is a far more common tactic for Loretta. Perhaps Leroy is starting to learn from her after all these years. He will need to learn a few more things like this from Loretta if he wants to ever win a year. Leroy earns a point. The day is tied 1-1.
- Leroy may have a litany of heath issues but I don't recall poor eyesight to be one of them. It's that eagle eye vision that allows him to be such a prolific ogler of other women. Loretta's desperate attempts to restrain Leroy's wondering eye once again meet failure as medical science has failed to keep up with her grand ambitions. To add insult to injury Leroy manages to spot another unsuspecting lady to gaze upon in the meantime. Leroy scores another point and takes a 2-1 lead.
- I can only imagine how unbearably awkward and uncomfortable it would be to be a guest at one of these parties with the Lockhorns; to sit in horror as this deeply unhappy middle aged man grotesquely dances about the scene, lampshade in hand, in a state of near blackout drunkenness. Listening to Loretta's cutting remarks about her troubled husband, delivered with a simmering, venomous, rage only adds to the misery. Still, when reduced to just a panel, it's pretty amusing. Loretta gets the point and manages to end the day on a 2-2 push.
Official Count:
Leroy - 68
Loretta - 90
Push - 44
Sunday Showdown Count:
Leroy - 7
Loretta - 13
Push - 9
Saturday, July 20, 2013
Friday, July 19, 2013
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Wednesday, July 17, 2013
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
July 16, 2013
*Author's Note: It's only fair that we see Leroy's fantasy spouse after we earlier learned about Loretta's dream mate.
Official Count:
Leroy - 66
Loretta - 88
Push - 43
Monday, July 15, 2013
July 15, 2013
*Author's Note: I'm not sure why Leroy would be upset that Loretta has decided NOT to cook.
Official Count:
Leroy - 66
Loretta - 88
Push - 42
Sunday, July 14, 2013
July 14, 2013: Sunday Showdown!
(Click to Enlarge)
Clockwise from the bottom left:
- Leroy's reaction seems more than a little subdued considering that their exercise classroom is now a crime scene for what appears to be at least a triple homicide. Why else would there be chalk lines on the ground? If it were just a case of fat people keeling over from an overly aggressive workout program, the police probably wouldn't be going through a forensic crime scene investigation. It looks like another case of cheapskate Leroy getting a cut rate membership at the most dangerous gym in Long Island. It's a push. The score remains 0-0.
- Every once in a while all the disappointments and defeats of being Leroy Lockhorn, consummate loser, become so overwhelming that even the smallest slight causes Leroy to have an uncontrollable outburst of pent up rage. Today Leroy takes his accumulated frustrations out on the near empty tube of toothpaste. Though Loretta could have made some sort of cutting remark here to burn Leroy and earn a point, she knew better than to further aggravate him when he was in one of this freak outs. It's another push as we still wait for the first point of the day.
- The "look" Loretta is referring to could also apply to Leroy's ridiculous beach outfit. It seems like a cross between an elderly Florida retiree and 80's WWE wrestler Cowboy Bob Orton. Is Leroy working under some deluded assumption that this clownish ensemble will attract all the blond beach bimbos? In contrast, Loretta's outfit appears surprisingly fashionable and age appropriate. So not only does Loretta get the point for chastising Leroy, she also wins on the fashion front. Loretta leads 1-0.
- Perhaps Pullman should maintain a note in his files as to who went first during the previous session to avoid this constant issue. Then again once he addresses that problem, the Lockhorns will find something new to get stuck arguing over. I wonder if the Lockhorns overhear all these complaints Pullman makes about them to his office secretary, not that Pullman even cares at this point; just as long as the checks continue to clear. It's the third push of the day as Loretta clings to a tight 1-0 lead.
- I suppose street magic is a common site in Nassau county considering it is the where the mindfreak himself Criss Angel hails from. The beefy Mr. Clean doppelganger performing the tricks seems more like a sideshow strongman than an illusionist. I applaud Leroy's hustle in finding a way to make fun of Loretta's cooking outside of the kitchen or dinning room. He needs to keep going after her greatest liability at every possible opportunity if he wants any chance of catching up by December. Leroy gets the point and forces the day to end in a 1-1 tie.
Official Count:
Leroy - 66
Loretta - 87
Push - 42
Sunday Showdown Count:
Leroy - 7
Loretta - 13
Push - 8
Saturday, July 13, 2013
Friday, July 12, 2013
Thursday, July 11, 2013
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Tuesday, July 9, 2013
Monday, July 8, 2013
Sunday, July 7, 2013
July 7, 2013: Sunday Showdown!
(Click to Enlarge)
Clockwise from the bottom left:
- I often wonder just how dumb Leroy really is. In situations like the above, it appears that he's feigning extra ignorance for the sake of annoying Loretta in other situations it's Loretta that's taking advantage of his stupidity. Leroy's aggressively low brow routine has helped him earn a fair share of points whenever Loretta dragged him to any high art institution; it's a shame he doesn't get more opportunities. Leroy wins the first point and leads 1-0.
- As a major caffeine addict myself, Loretta's weak insult mildly cuts me down as well. Of all the addictions Leroy has, Loretta is being sort of petty by picking on a minor one like caffeine. She should be going more after his addictions to alcohol, food, and rage; fertile areas of serious personal dysfunction ripe for cruel taunting. Still, you don't get extra points for being meaner (maybe in the future if I rework the scoring system). Loretta scores a point and the day is tied at 1-1.
- There goes my appetite for the entire week. One can really see how creepily similar the Lockhorns look when one of them puts on the other's clothes. Here, Leroy is one yellow wig away from being the splitting image of Loretta. Freaky. It makes you wonder if Leroy and Loretta aren't actually related in some way and that their extreme dislike of each other is due to them being forced to marry each other for some unknown reason. It would also explain the lack of attraction to each other. However we should stick to one horrifying image at a time. Loretta's mocking wins her the point. Loretta jumps ahead 2-1.
- I was conflicted over where to assign the point. The scene is a knock against Loretta's horrible driving skills but all Leroy is doing here is reading the letter from the insurance company detailing how difficult it is for them to insure her. If anything the point should go to the insurance company. One could also argue that Loretta should get the point since she is spitefully making Leroy pay more for his insurance due to her reckless action. It was difficult but I'm going with a push. Loretta leads 2-1 going into the final panel.
- Not that it makes any difference on the day to Leroy but his lack of presence turns what would have been a point for Loretta into just a push. Once again, a reference to the Lockhorns' uncharacteristic tech savviness comes up out of the blue. Older tech illiterate individuals should be inspired by this development, if a couple of dinosaurs like the Lockhorns can join the digital revolution then anyone can be caught up. It's a push, but Loretta takes the Sunday with a tight 2-1 victory.
Official Count:
Leroy - 65
Loretta - 84
Push - 39
Sunday Showdown Count:
Leroy - 7
Loretta - 13
Push - 7
Saturday, July 6, 2013
Friday, July 5, 2013
Thursday, July 4, 2013
July 4, 2013
*Author's Note: It is quite a disturbing sight to see both Lockhorns holding hands and smiling like that. They must be high or something.
Official Count:
Leroy - 65
Loretta - 81
Push - 39
Wednesday, July 3, 2013
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
Monday, July 1, 2013
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